Feasterville PA (PBC) McDonald’s Corporation announced that President Donald Trump previously a volunteer employee at the McDonald’s restaurant in Feasterville, PA was fired today after he was linked to an outbreak of serious E.Coli infection in Big Mac sandwiches. A spokesperson for McDonald’s said that it became apparent that Trump was spreading something when the 14-state outbreak started shortly after Trump volunteered to serve food in an election campaign stunt.
No One Saw Trump Wash His Hands
“It was a lapse on our part. We can’t have people making our customers sick,” said John Stapleton, a McDonald’s spokesperson. He continued, “we don’t know whether he was not washing his hands after using the bathroom or what, but we just can’t have this happening. We take cleanliness and hygiene seriously at McDonald’s. We apologize to all our guests.”
Outbreak Previously Linked to Tainted Onions
The CDC had previously linked the outbreak that sickened 104 resulting in 34 hospitalizations and one death to tainted onions from Taylor Farms. “We don’t know how Trump did it. Usually when it’s an employee the outbreak is restricted to just one site. But he managed to spread it over 14 states. It’s some kind of superspreader event that we don’t understand yet,” said the spokesperson. Taylor Farms representatives said that they we’re shocked to find out President Trump was at fault, but they were happy to be exonerated.
McDonald’s Pledges More Stringent Hiring Practices
McDonald’s has vowed not to hire anymore former presidents. “We hire only the best immigrants to work at McDonalds. We train and pay them well, sometimes above minimum wage. We don’t need volunteers causing problems.” McDonald’s said any future volunteers would have to undergo rigorous background checks and training before being allowed to work.
