Hurricane Milton Sues NOAA For Misgendering Him
Hurricane Milton, a category 5 storm that struck central Florida in October of 2024, sued the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration today in Federal Court for damages that resulted from misgendering. “They knew I was a guy and they still called me a Hurricane. It was devastating. I was traumatized. I was so hurt I couldn’t even speak for the whole week I was in Florida. I didn’t know what to say to my friends and family” said Milton. NOAA administrator Grimm said “You just can’t be naming a hurricane with a guy’s name and then calling it a ‘hurricane’. It’s stupid and it makes us look bad.”
Trump Will Contest Election
In a stunning defeat for former Vice-President Kamala Harris, Donald Trump won the sixth-grade US presidential election at Our Lady of Perpetual Motion School in Pirates Bay CA. Trump immediately contested his election victory.
McDonald’s Fires Trump After Linking Him to E.Coli Outbreak
McDonald’s fired President Donald Trump today after linking him to a 14-state outbreak of E.coli. Trump vowed to sue to get his job back.
Diablo Power Chooses Pirates Bay for Demonstration
New Nuclear Reactor to be Located Downtown Pirates Bay, CA (PBC) Officials from Diablo Power and Light announced an agreement with city officials from Pirates Bay to locate a small modular nuclear reactor downtown. This will be the first demonstration of a small modular reactor (SMR) in the United States. Several are currently being constructed […]
Wars Ends. Ukraine to Get Participation Trophy
US ambassador to the UN, Linda Thomas-Greenfield, President of the United Nations Security Council, announced the end of the Russian Ukrainian war today. “We’ve reviewed the situation and have discussed the situation at length with the parties involved and we have decided that the war is over.”